越南的回忆(转自英语幽默)
五角大楼最近发现官员太多了，决定弄一个提前退休奖励方案，承诺退休人员除了能拿到全额退休金外，还可得到额外一笔钱，可任选身体两点，测量两点之间的直线距离，每英寸1万美元。
第一个是一位空军将军，要求测量头顶到脚尖之间的距离，6英尺，他拿到了720000美元的支票。
第二个是位陆军将军，要求测量从伸展的手指尖到脚尖之间的距离，8英尺，他得到了一张960000美元的支票。
第三位是一个灰色头发的年长的海军司令，要求测量“小鸡顶端到睾丸之间的距离”。
工作人员让他再考虑一下，这为司令员坚持自己的要求，并要求卫生官员测量。
卫生官员？“天哪，你的睾丸呢？”
“在越南。”
Memories of Vietnam
The Pentagon recently found it had too many officers, and offered an early retirement bonus. They promised any officer who retired his full annual benefits plus $10,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points of his body, with the officer getting to select any pair of points he wished.
The first man, an Air Force General, accepted. He asked the pension man to measure from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. Six feet. He walked out with a check of $720,000.
The second man, an Army general, asked them to measure from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. Eight feet. He walked out with a check for $960,000.
When the third one, a grizzled old Navy Commander, was asked where to measure, he told the pension man: From the tip of my penis to my testicles.
The pension man suggested that perhaps he might like to reconsider, pointing out the nice checks the previous two generals had received. The commander insisted and the pension expert said that would be fine, but that he'd better get the medical officer to do the measuring.
The medical officer attended and asked the Commander to drop 'em. He did. The medical officer placed the tape on the tip of the Commander's penis and began to work back. My God! he said. Where are your testicles?
In Vietnam, the Commander replied.
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